I look forward to him rejecting me...

In Byron Katie's Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet, the final step is to put a stressful thought after the words, "I look forward to."

Many times I have felt rejected by my husband. I have felt that he rejects my cry for love. I have felt that he rejects my feelings, and/or my requests.

While doing the process Byron Katie calls, The Work, I have explored this experience of rejection. Her process encourages you to turnaround your stressful thoughts in as many ways as you can. If my original statement was "My husband rejects me," I can try, "I reject him"; "He doesn't reject me"; and "I reject me".

In this process, it is possible to see the mirroring of my own unhealed behavior.

What I have come to notice is the way that many of us reach a point where our romantic partners, bosses, children, mothers, fathers, friends do not give us that love we desire. We experience suffering due to our disappointment and conclusions that we are not lovable, good enough or worthy of a loving relationship.

How could we say we look forward to this experience?

What I have come to learn is that it forces us to be the love of our lives. During a time when I felt my husband was not affectionate enough, and I made the meaning that he didn't love me. I started to say words to myself in the mirror and to wrap my arms around myself in bed. I began to say to myself the words I desired to hear from him. Part of me didn' t buy it, and another part knew it was the ultimate destination of a true loving relationship with myself.

When I let go of needing things from my husband, he could offer them more freely. He has begun being more affectionate, when I am not seemingly trying to suck the life out of him. :)

Each time another does not offer the love we desire, we have the opportunity to offer the love to ourselves. A Course In Miracles says there is only ONE. Meaning, there is only ONE being, ONE mind, ONE person showing up in many individuations (trippy). This thought provokes that what we give to ourselves, we give to all.What we withhold to ourselves, we withhold from all. When we seek outside of ourselves for LOVE, we are saying that we dont have, or we are lacking somehow.

Once you look forward to rejection, you are also FREE because when you don't need love from another, you can allow them to show up authentically.

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