"I am willing to feel that my husband hides things from me and that we lead separate lives." This sentence came from a Byron Katie "judge-your-neighbor-worksheet" that I just finished this morning. The idea that my husband hides things from me and lives a separate life from me, has frightened me greatly in the past. At one time, to cope with this fear, I employed myself as a detective. I didn't receive a salary. Instead, I earned a lot of terror, anxious adrenaline, and consequently, an emotional hangover that would plague me for days. Thank God I hung up my spying glass and my bloodhound instincts months and months ago. Last night I had a sort of relapse when I brought my husband his dinner and it appeared that he changed what was on his phone screen. This used to be a massive trigger for me as it poked at this fear of him having some other love, or need met outside of me (controlling). Truthfully, I don't know if he was picking out my bi...