Holy Relationship bound

My Ego dressed up as a dictator...nice try Taking a moment to gather myself, I feel I have been beat up a bit by my ego mind. All the while, I was aware of the whole experience while not fully buying into it. Put into more concrete context, I was triggered by an experience of disappointment and letdown that taunted me to swirl down into a pool of anger, sadness and despair, all the while present to it and not really taking the bait. There was some new distance between the ranting of my ego and the agreement of my...what to say....spiritually mature Self, capital S. I felt like a young child that didn't get her way and on one hand, and had accepted the outcome. On the other hand, part of me was so used to going into a tantrum that the tantrum was trying to gain its normal momentum. Only this time, I had a knowing that the tantrum was pointless. So there I am without a real sense of what to do with myself with an army of emotions attempting to surge within me, and another part...

I've been noticing that recently, I have been getting offended quite easily with my number one enlightenment coach, my husband. Today, he woke up early and began playing videos from his phone. It was 5:30am. Let the mind training begin :) Here were the thoughts that were triggered: 1. I could get up and meditate. 2. He is so inconsiderate of my sleep. 3. Breathe, count your breaths. Stay peaceful. 4. What a jerk! I said, "Honey, I am trying to sleep." Interesting choice of victim words. I could have said, "Honey, the noise is bothersome to me. Please turn it down." I could also look at my interest in being bothered. In the end, after he turned down the sound and I could still hear it. I chose to go sleep down on the couch. I didn't feel antagonistic, so I felt I wasn't losing this peace battle to the ego...however.... I grabbed by pillow and made zero eye contact with him. A silent, "You are not on my good list right now...